There will be no spoilers in this review of Pirates of the Caribbean 3: The End of the World. There will be warnings and some advice.
If you didn’t enjoy Pirates I or Pirates 2, you definitely will not enjoy Pirates 3. These stories take place in an alternate universe that only superficially bears any resemblance to our own. Most of the characters speak some form of English, but it is only a form and there are no subtitles or rewind feature to make them completely intelligible. However, if you can enter into the spirit of this movie, then you’re in for a rollicking good time.
Two pieces of advice…
1.) The movie is three hours long, but the action is frenetic. Do not drink a jumbo soda during the previews. You will regret it. There is no pause button.
2.) Stay through the bitter end of the credits. Do not think about your ready-to-burst bladder because you didn’t listen to my advice about the soda. Read the names of all those little people who worked hard to make the summer blockbuster you just saw and who have mothers and fathers who are very, very proud of them. Read all the thank yous. Check your voice mails if you have to. Just stay through the credits.
The movie begins on a dark and somber note and for that scene alone earns it’s PG-13 rating. The fun begins a bit later and not all at once.
If, like Sis#2, you thought Johnny Depp was the only reason to watch
There are more twists and turns in this movie than there are dark alleys in Tortugas.
The Special Effects are spectacular, but the director remembers the story is about the characters and that’s what he concentrates on. (Frankly, this is what I think George Lucas forgot when he filmed the latest Star Wars trilogy.)
Surrender yourself to the charms of Capt. Jack Sparrow, Elizabeth Swann, Will Turner, and Captain Barossa. Don’t abandon hope, quite, but do abandon rational thought for the next three hours. We cheered, we laughed, we actually applauded. And I’m ready to do it again!
On the March Hare scale: 5 out of 5 Golden Tickets