Thursday, November 15, 2007

Communicating With Adult Children

The complaint was a familiar one: "Mommy, I'm sick." The delivery method was different--DS#1 sent me an IM.

I did what any good mother would do when her child is sick and is 300 miles south. No, not jump in the car and tear down Highway 101. I IM'd him back: "Go to the Student Health Clinic."

DS#1 and I communicate at least once a week. Since he pays his own cell phone bill, he usually sends me an IM while I'm at work. It's a little bit awkward, since I can type faster than he can and I sometimes have to actually do the job I'm paid to do. But we generally catch up on what's going on. Like his plans for Thanksgiving. Or how his classes are going.

DD#1 still lives at home, but between work, school, and her social schedule, I rarely see her. Our usual mode of communication is text messaging via cell phone, since she seems to ignore her voice mails. I was floored when I came home on Monday and she was cooking dinner.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Cooking dinner," she answered. She knew what my real question was; she chose to ignore it.

But I did get to see her latest piercing: a bar that transects the top of her ear.

"Why did you do that?"

"I've always wanted an industrial piercing and I knew you'd have a fit if I had my tongue pierced."

Damn straight, I would. Four years and $$$ worth of orthodontia and oral surgery endangered by a fad.

I admit that I just don't understand the point of the bar. Earrings are pretty. A steel bar is... well, a steel bar. However, she paid for it--and I was shocked at how much she spent. But, it's her money.

The younger two still depend on Hubs and I to drive them, so our communication is much more straightforward and person-to-person. I kind of miss that with the older two, although I will admit IMs are a much quieter way to argue!